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You’ve probably heard the phrase, “It takes a village.” We usually use it to talk about raising kids—but it applies to adults, too. This isn’t just a parenting thing; it’s a human one. And even though we’re more connected than ever through texts, DMs, and group chats, many of us still feel deeply disconnected.
That’s a problem, because we were created for connection. God designed us to grow through meaningful relationships—relationships that encourage us, challenge us, and help shape us into who he created us to be. And nothing replaces our unique need for connection with other women.
So why does that kind of depth feel so hard to find? For many of us, a few things get in the way. You might feel pressure to appear “put together,” which makes vulnerability feel risky. Life is full and fast, and deep relationships require time and presence. And past hurt can make trust feel complicated—even unsafe.
So how do we move forward and pursue meaningful connection instead of settling for surface-level relationships?
Start with an honest inventory. Which relationships leave you encouraged and grounded? Which ones stay on the surface? Who are you intentionally investing in—and how open are you willing to be invested in yourself? If those questions are hard to answer, it may be a sign that something needs to shift.
Then, take a step—however small. Push through the awkward early stages and pursue depth. That might mean joining a Group, serving alongside others, inviting someone to coffee or a walk, or seeking healing through counseling so past wounds don’t hold you back. It could look like investing in a younger woman—or learning from someone who’s walked a little farther ahead.
However it happens, plant the seeds of friendship. Nurture them with intention. And trust God with the growth.
Next Step: If you’re longing for deeper, life-giving relationships, talk to God about it. Ask him to open your heart, guide you toward new connections, and show you where he’s inviting you to take a step.